[She felt a little like explaining, though, so he might get an insight here. Leaning forward, she looked across at him from her knuckles and shrugged.]
Mebbe a little, but think of it this way. I 'am' jealousy so I have to intentionally tone it down and remember not to think that way, otherwise I will.
I see you, I figure out how you're smarter, prettier, more confident, more skilled, more anything than I am. As soon as I can, I figure out how you're better. And if you're like Oso? Kinda... not? In any way? Don't get me wrong. He's a good guy, just sorta pathetic sometimes? But if you're lower tier than me?
I'll figure out how you're handling it better. Better at coping, better attitude. [Hence Oso took work, but she found it. Guy embraced his state perfectly.] If I have a lot of trouble? It nags at me. nettles me. Can't shut it off until I really shove it down, or I find that thing. And then I home in on it.
Because jealousy makes me what I am... but trying not to do that? I ... uh... think I can here. It's just a thousand year old habit. Really really hard to break.
[In short, the answer to "Is she jealous of..." was "Yes." Unless it was Legion, and maybe Cole.]
no subject
Mebbe a little, but think of it this way. I 'am' jealousy so I have to intentionally tone it down and remember not to think that way, otherwise I will.
I see you, I figure out how you're smarter, prettier, more confident, more skilled, more anything than I am. As soon as I can, I figure out how you're better. And if you're like Oso? Kinda... not? In any way? Don't get me wrong. He's a good guy, just sorta pathetic sometimes? But if you're lower tier than me?
I'll figure out how you're handling it better. Better at coping, better attitude. [Hence Oso took work, but she found it. Guy embraced his state perfectly.] If I have a lot of trouble? It nags at me. nettles me. Can't shut it off until I really shove it down, or I find that thing. And then I home in on it.
Because jealousy makes me what I am... but trying not to do that? I ... uh... think I can here. It's just a thousand year old habit. Really really hard to break.
[In short, the answer to "Is she jealous of..." was "Yes." Unless it was Legion, and maybe Cole.]