tabularasa_rp | 004 - Lucid Dreaming

004 - Lucid Dreaming

Lucid Dreaming Event Info Pt.1 ▲ Event Info Pt.2 ▼ Comments Please see the two info posts linked above for details on the nature of the event, the nightmares within, and the setting it takes place in. You may ask any unanswered questions in either post. If your character dies at any point during the dream event, please leave a comment in the death report thread to notify the mods.

As a final reminder, all characters will fall asleep for the full duration of this event whether you decide to take part or not. You may continue tagging threads that take place before the event, but everyone will fall asleep simultaneously.

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Falling Asleep, Waking Up
The shift happens without warning, much like the first time people appeared in the world. Perhaps you remember what you were doing in the last moments before a strange feeling of exhaustion overwhelmed you - or perhaps you remember nothing at all. Whatever it may be, you've appeared somewhere new. A seemingly ordinary train station, if not for the bizarre walls of flesh blocking the only exits. The only path forward is down into the pulsating depths, a humid breeze pushing at your back.

There may be others here with you, or you may be alone. Could there be more people trapped in this strange place? You won't find them just by standing around.

Nightmares
The screeching of a distant train will echo through the tunnels on occasion, shadows flicking through the translucent flesh of the walls. Sometimes, however, instead of fading away the noise will only grow louder, closer, until it sounds like the train should be upon you. It never appears, but something else always will.

The train is a siren call for nightmares, and you're unfortunate enough to be their victim. The shadows turn alive, twisting and growing as they rise up from the ground and begin to transform. What form they take varies, but the shadows of the mind know the true fears of those who walk among them. Are you prepared to face the darkness?

Volcanic Panic

The shadows congeal at the edges of the floor, and soon after a hot orange glow begins to fill the room - molten lava is pooling in from the other end of the tunnel. It rolls slowly forward, devouring everything it touches with an unquenchable searing hunger, leaving behind only the charred bones of its victims... although, strangely, the tunnels themselves appear to be completely unharmed.

Outrunning the flow of lava shouldn't be a problem, but there seems to be no end to it. How long can you run from something that never stops? Or worse, what happens if you find yourself surrounded? You'll need to find a way to higher ground before that happens.

A Radiant Plague

The shadows rise up into familiar shapes, and at first glance it'd be easy to mistake them for people. They may even share the faces and voices of people you know, stumbling towards you with wide, open arms... and empty, glowing eyes filled with an orange light. Something smells sickly sweet, and it's only once they're close enough to grab you that they begin to attack.

These are not your friends, and they'll do whatever it takes to make you one of them instead. Unfortunately, it's not an experience you'll be able to survive. Your only hope is to fight back before the plague can take hold, lest you become another mindless husk that knows only to further spread the infection.

Trust No One, Not Even Yourself

The shadows stretch and fill the air, choking everything in a thick blanket of darkness... before dispersing just as quickly as they'd appeared. A few moments pass and nothing else seems to be happening. You must've gotten lucky this time!

... Or did you?

Surely it can't be that simple. Nothing else here has been, so something must have happened just now. It's only you and the person you're currently traveling with... but are you sure that's really them right now? How do you know they haven't been possessed by another nightmare, waiting until you let your guard down to stab you in the back? Should you interrogate them to be sure, or start with restraining them and ask questions later? Wouldn't it be better to just kill them before things get out of hand? The sooner you strike, the safer you'll be when their true form emerges.

Yes, that must be the real explanation. It has to be them that's been possessed by a nightmare. What else could it be?

Joker’s Wild

There’s no limit to what form the shadows can take. The world may have its own perception of fear, but your nightmares are something only you could understand. What darkness lurks in the depths of your heart?

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I wouldn't say that. They could have hauled you over their shoulder like a sack of potatoes and booked it. The dog could keep up. Pretty sure of that.

[She flopped down onto her rear, curling her arms around her knees, clutching at her legs and looking over at Rinoa for a moment, eyes glittering green while they chatted, fighting the jealousy she felt over those damned wing. Seriously. Pretty.]

You thought it was him. Because you want him to be here. We're not exactly substitutes. Tifa's lucky she has Cloud around.

[ In any other situation, Rinoa would laugh. It's the kind of statement that should make her laugh. But instead, she just offers Parsee a weak smile, sitting down across from her with a small nod. She's probably right. But still, she's lucky Parsee got there when she did.

It's a thought that makes her frown, unhappiness still twisting in her gut. But it's not until Parsee speaks again that a chill of something else goes down her spine, something that feels like anger and sadness and want all at once. ]

And Aerith. [ It's said with a bitterness that's unlike anything Parsee would ever have heard from her. And it's not like it's coming from nowhere - she really has felt twists of jealousy toward her new friends before. ] They have their most important people, and even familiar places from home! What do I have?

[ As if in answer, Angelo and Felix nudge their noses against her side, but they go ignored for now, Rinoa reaching up to angrily dash tears away from her cheeks. ]

It's not fair.

Right now, you've got me.

[She hadn't mentioned Aerith for a reason. It was a test of sorts. Rinoa had picked out at least one of the other names right on her own, and she could hear the bitterness forming in her voice. She reached up to brush at one of the tears Rinoa's cheek, the aura of green around her pulsing a little.

I... need to stop. I'm going to hurt her.]

It isn't. there's a lot of things that aren't fair... you... you should back off, Rinoa. I'm getting under your skin. You've got me, but I'm crappy company.

[ It's a vague realization, something that surfaces in her mind as Parsee says it, as she fights the urge to tear her face away from the hand that brushes at the tear on her cheek. (And why? She's never minded physical contact before...)

Her power. The feelings... it's Parsee's power, clinging to her real feelings and amplifying them, and...

...and right now, Parsee, who has to deal with the horribleness of such feelings all the time, who's always alone, is telling her to leave. Not for Parsee's good, but for hers. A move entirely unselfish, entirely for Rinoa's benefit.

It's enough to send another spark of irritation flaring through her, as she turns her head away. She's never been that strong. She's always relied too much on other people. Why can't she find that strength for herself, the same strength Parsee has? More tears blink into her eyes, and she lowers her gaze, keeping it away from the other. ]

N-no. I told you before, we're friends. I can't leave you like this.

[It was selfish and selfless. She didn't want to hurt Rinoa out of fear that she might not come back if she hurt her bad enough, after all. So... some of it was the desire to keep the things she'd gained so far. But here she was. Doing exactly what Parsee expected of her.]

You are so stubborn... I envy that about you. A dog's biting you hand and you're still trying to pet it, to calm it down. [Grunt.]

I... can't make you go away. I could scream at you, but you'd just stay close. Just know, you're going to be really bitter and lonely the more you are around me. Ngh... Guess we could do that together for the moment.

[She reached the palm of her hand and gave her a sad, tired grin while those glowing eyes pierced Rinoa's, a sigh on her lips.]

You're my problem today, not Squal's, heh.

[ Parsee's words remind her, vaguely, that there's a dull ache in her hand, something left over from when Angelo was trying to pull her back from the shadowy creature. It's enough to bring her attention to her animal friends, crouching down and patting them both as they continue to nudge and nuzzle at her sides. There's even a depth of her feelings reserved for the two of them, a jealousy over how simple their love for her is, how it isn't marred by the pain of loss and fear.

With a sigh, Rinoa sinks out of her crouch and into a sit, looking up at Parsee with a tired, unhappy light in her eyes. ]

You think I'm stubborn? You live like this all the time... [ For a moment, it might sound like she's jealous of Parsee's misery, but the next sentence clarifies the feelings swirling in her gut: ] I couldn't do it. You're... so strong.

[ A pause, and then she adds, tone bitter: ] I kind of hate that.

[ So much for not being ashamed of needing others. ]

[She watched her flop into a seat. In that moment, Parsee almost ran. She could run, and the effects would wear off, but Rinoa wasn't leaving, and had told her that she didn't want her to, even if it hurt. Slowly, she got down on her knees behind her and wrapped her arms around the dark haired girl from behind. The aura floated around them both, though it was lower, not as potent as before.]

And you're here, letting me stay here with you, even as I'm hurting you. I don't deserve friends like you. I kind of hate it too... [Her arms tightened.] But... I don't want you to leave. I'm jealous of Squall, you should know. The way you cared about the words of even a fake version.

[ Despite the unhappiness clamoring for purchase on her heart, there's a relief in the way Parsee moves to hug her, arms tight around her from behind. Her head leans back, dropping to lay on the other's shoulder, and if it wasn't for the bitter jealousy burning in her eyes, the smile on her lips would surely look amused, triumphant. ]

You know, I told you we'd be friends.

[ Parsee didn't seem to believe her at the time, but they're here now, Rinoa stubbornly holding on as always, and Parsee not giving in to the instinct to push her away. A victory to enjoy later, then, when she doesn't feel like she wants to just curl up and cry, or scream, or both. Because right now, her smile is twisting into something less kind, a shake of her head as she sits up again. ]

I hate that I cared. It's like you said, he's a fake. I don't understand how... [ There's a pause, a frown as the words sort themselves in her head, and she sighs. ] So many people have their loved ones here, Parsee. It's not just Tifa and Aerith and Cloud. Even Ren...

New friends are nice but it's not the same.

[ She's cycling back to those same feelings again. Later, she'll be horrified at how easily she was able to reject the idea of the new people in her life in favor of the old, especially when they're people she's come to care about a lot. But right now, she's fixating. ]

Ngh... it's never quite the same, but... it's also a chance for something else. Maybe something you didn't have. [She gripped more tightly and pulled her in even more, the hug a fraction possessive. The way that she held on, she was definitely trying to get Rinoa to focus on her and her alone.]

You know the difference between envy and possessiveness isn't that big. I'm jealous of them having their friends, jealous of them having someone that matters so much to them. Kind of wish I could get that close again...

But it doesn't end well. And... I don't want to get too close. If I did and lose one of you, I'd go nuts I think, for a bit.

[Yep, they were both fixating right now. One on jealousies of others, and the other on being jealous of literally every last person that Rinoa was thinking about right then. Why couldn't she just think about her right this instant?]

[ The chance for something else. There's a bitterness there, that same unhappiness at the forefront as she considers the words, shaking her head. Back at home, she had everything she could ever have wanted. Why can't she have that now, here, like some of them do?

The hug is tight enough that it almost hurts, but she doesn't complain. Rather, there's a selfishness to it, a weird gratitude that someone cares enough to keep her grounded when otherwise she feels like the hurt and jealousy might drag her away. Her hands come up, hold onto the arms wrapped around her, her eyes closing. ]

You won't lose us. It's okay to get close.

[ The words take more effort than they normally would, but they're important enough that she has to say them no matter how much the feelings are swamping her right now. She's still the same person, right? She still wants to help her, right? ]

We'll find a way, okay? We'll make it work. Somehow.

[ No one should be alone with these feelings. ]

Don't. Don't promise what you can't give me. I don't get to keep you forever, and Squall will get you back eventually. Just... let me enjoy the time I get you for.

[She'd gone through this with Legion a little bit. It was important to her to stop the promise that they'd stay forever. There was no guarantee. Most of them wanted to go back home. They weren't like Legion, who had nowhere to go really, or her who might have preferred it here a little.

No, no promises like that, though... she sounded like she appreciated what Rinoa said anyway.]

I'm... I'm ok trying. we'll figure something out. Eventually. I'll... put up with failures, if you put up with them too. As long as you don't mind getting pricked sometimes?

You can keep an old hedgehog close.

[ She wants to explain that she's not trying to talk about forever. After all, they all want to make it back home, don't they?

...Maybe not Tifa and Aerith and Cloud, she can't help but think; Maybe not Ren and his friends... Maybe they have enough of home with them that they don't care as much as I do.

—But that's not what she meant. She wants to say that they'll find a way to make it work that even like this, even with Parsee's powers at full strength, she'll find a way to stick close to her, without needing to feel like this in turn.

Instead of saying any of that, though, she just nods. There are too many words swamping her mind, crowding her feelings with anger and hurt and pain. ]

...Okay. We'll do it together.

[She could take home or leave it. Right now... she was liking it hee sort of. But that was another matter, for another day. The agreement, even if implied, was enough for her. She sighed a little, holding onto Rinoa for a second before pulling back.]

Alright. Together... not really sure what we're gonna do, but we'll do it.

We should get out of here first...

[ Rinoa nods. She doesn't know either... but surely they can figure something out. When Parsee pulls back, she straightens up with a small smile and gets to her feet. ]

Yeah.

[ Rinoa's wings manifest from her back, and she looks across at Parsee with a nod. ]

Time to figure this out, right?

[She was starting to get used to the sensation, clearly. Good. For a split second, Parsee wanted to turn it up. She wanted to see just how jealous Rinoa could get, what she'd do, how foolish she'd... and then she internally quashed it. She wanted Rinoa to still be there tomorrow, to be jealous of, to ... probably forgive her because that seemed in her nature. She stamped it down hard and swallowed.]

Yeah... whatever this is.

[She stepped up next to her, breathing in and out carefully. Her eyes closed and she threaded an arm underneath the wings, around Rinoa's back.]

Ok. You get to be the savior today. Fly me away from that fake Squall forever.

[ It's not so much that Rinoa's used to anything. The feeling is still there, seething away, ugly and angry. She wants to scream, but she knows too that there are bigger things at stake. That desire to help cuts through everything else.

If it were deeper, though, they might be in trouble.

Another deep breath, and she wraps an arm around Parsee in return. She probably doesn't need to - she could just cast Float on her in the same way she did Angelo and Felix both - but there's something comforting about being with someone else, even if it's the selfsame person from whom the ugly feelings are originating. ]

Yeah. Away.

[ She takes to the air, trying not to think about the fact that she wants to take them right back to him, no matter how fake he might be.

Ugh, to not have these feelings... ]

We'll wake up soon enough...

[And as she said it, she clung to Rinoa a little, her grip tighter than it needed to be. She wasn't going to put a lot of thought into this, but deep down she knew she was the source of half this problem, but like any drug... once you were hooked on the sensation it was hard to kick away. After all, the cause of the problem was also a bit of a satiation.

And she didn't want to think too much about that right then.]

(OOC: I'm fine continuing this along with the other if you want, or handwaving here. Both are perfectly viable options.)

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004 - Lucid Dreaming

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