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(no subject)

Who: Espio + anyone
What: One very belated intro
Where: Here and There
When: "November", if November exists
Content Warnings: Likely references to him being from a sex-or-die CRAU in the tags.

1. The Sky

[Why, you might ask, is there a short man with a lizard tail standing on a rock, arms spread wide as he laughs almost maniacally at the sky? There must surely be a reason, right?

Before he can be interrupted, he notices whoever approaches him and his laughter trails off as he turns to face them.]

Look at that! Five years, and they give me this - it's like going home! How long's that been like that?

[He jabs a thumb towards the sky behind him, where shapes are twisting and coiling just like in the weird part of the Special Zone. It has been so long since he's seen a sky as colourful as the one he was once used to that the little taste of home actually makes him feel slightly ill... still, seeing it, all he can do is laugh, even if it's not a happy laugh.]

2. How to Be Social

[Still convinced this is only an illusion, just like the countless illusions he's experienced in the past several months, Espio has not been particularly inclined to socialise. The problem with that is that while he does not want to go through meeting and greeting new people who might not even be real, being alone is... well, it's lonely! So while he has mostly been steering away from more obvious social hubs and has instead wandered what feels like the entire habitable area for he doesn't know how long, eventually he gives in and shows his face somewhere with people. What few people there are in this place, anyway...

The Heavenly Blanc is as good a bet as any, but he can also be found somewhere in the Underground Academy. Either way, his idea of a greeting is questionable:]

Still haven't seen anyone I know. How 'bout you?

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Paramilitary. Mercenary, technically, but my role's mostly instruction.

[Despite Kaiba's clear disapproval of the idea of 'military', Espio can at least be perfectly accepting of that, and gives a small nod. People have to stick to their principles, after all.]

...never heard of your company. Might not be the same world... what did they do? Before you took over.

Same difference really- if not worse.

[Since mercenaries could pick and choose to serve the highest bidder with real allegiance to none. So this guy didn't engage in combat himself, but sent others to do so with the knowledge he imparted on them. Figures]

I'm not surprised, no one here has so far. [Taking a moment to draw in a breath he continued] Manufactured arms in a wide variety. Everything from tanks to assault rifles. The previous ceo wasn't all that particular about who purchased his products either.

Good riddance to both.

[If he thinks Espio doesn't engage in combat, he should try to fight him! That'll go well.]

You have principles. Good.

I have reasons for being paramilitary, and it's not the pay. ...definitely not the pay.

[A small cough there, because the pay is shit.]

Their academy is one of the few places that's open to aliens like me, and I will defend it. I'd prefer it if it didn't need defending.

[Look he tries to limit physical contact as much as possible.. that one altercation was a fluke. Oh- and that time he grabbed Blue- also.. a... fluke.]

I have my convictions. [The correction being unnecessary but principles sounded high-handed]

I'll just bet.

[Trying to figure this guy out. If he wasn't there for the money, then why? At least an explanation is forthcoming.]

When you go out looking for trouble, it's bound to come back at you.

[Alien. Sure. Kaiba had met another alien here but that was beside the point.]

[Eh, same difference. The meaning was clear.]

The problems were there long before I arrived, and I'm in no position to change them. I just have to deal with them.

Edited 2020-11-27 05:07 (UTC)

[It really was nit-picking]

Had. It's past tense now, as far as I'm aware. I've never heard of that unit before.

[... And so was that.]

So what do people call you...?

Edited 2020-11-27 05:59 (UTC)

[Nitpicking indeed, and Espio can’t see the point. He just furrows his brow, gives a sharp exhale through his nose, and makes an effort to withhold comment. For now.]

Espio.

[It's a struggle for a lot of people, it's not just you Espio]

It's succinct.

[Short for espionage? Fake name? Highly probable. Still that wouldn't be unheard of for paramilitary.]

It's actually Espio 'the Chameleon', but all that's left of the 'chameleon' is this.

[His tail swishes a little from side to side. It's not just that, but it's the most visible chameleon trait he has.]

I'm not meant to look human.

.. Of course it is. [Said with a disbelieving shake of the head] Why wouldn't it be? [A better question might be, 'Why can't I meet anyone semi-normal?]

[The fact that the tail looks convincing and doesn't seem to be operated by animatronics is a bit impressive.. however the claim is still preposterous]

I'm not meant to look human either, none of us are. [Briefly feeding in to the delusions.]

Nice try.

[Given that Kaiba has generally been disbelieving and has something of an attitude, he’s going to go ahead and guess he’s taking the piss.]

It wouldn’t surprise me, but the vast majority of off-worlders I’ve met have been human. Most from some version of Earth or another. No reason to think here’s any different.

[He sighs, and offers a big shrug.]

Met a lot of trolls and ponies too, but it’s been mostly humans.

[Given the response, Espio seemed to understand how ridiculous what he was proposing sounded]

Gee, I wonder why that could be. [Maybe because bipedal talking animals were the stuff of fiction so of course this guy would have run into mostly humans.] So- we've basically established where I'm from, it is Earth, but where are you supposed to be from again? Where is it normal to have a sky that looks like this outside of an intense aurora borealis?

[What was Kaiba prolonging his own suffering with this small talk- eh.. strangely enough he found himself oddly intrigued by this peculiar person]

Now you're putting me on.. [Has to be] Why would it be trolls and ponies specifically? [~~Because homestuck, and mlp exist~~]

Dunno. Probably just common in some other world.

[It’s a sensible enough reason, he thinks! However, he then makes a disgruntled, annoyed sound, and shakes his head.]

...why is it always Earth? And so many different Earths, too! No wonder you nuts always think reality revolves around your own damn planet, but you all can’t even be consistent on what Earth even is!

[Really, why? He sounds genuinely put out by this. What the hell is so important about that one planet that it’s got countless different versions??

To be fair, he’s also well aware there’s multiple versions of Mobius, but still.]

I’m from Meridian. And yes, the sky looks like that.

[Somehow Espio's exasperation was more amusing than offputting]

Got me. Maybe because it's the only planet capable of supporting the lives of complex organisms? [Meaning in his own solar system but not seeing a need to qualify it. There had been no evidence of intelligent life in other regions of space yet.] I haven't run into anyone's account that seemed all that different..

[It's clearly because it's the planet Seto Kaiba calls home. The universe revolves around him]

In case you haven't looked at a globe lately.. the meridian covers a wide array of locations, want to narrow it down to the Atlantic, Pacific, or Indian ocean? [Look- he still thinks this furry is from Earth too..]

...oh for... Meridian’s the name of the planet, idiot! And whoever told you there’s only one world capable of sustaining life needs a serious reality check! Do you actually believe that? You realise that’s nonsense, right?

Go ask other people what world they all come from. I guarantee you, not everyone here’ll be from Earth.

So it's just a coincidence that the term is also utilized on Earth? [Bristling a bit at the insult] I have nothing to dispute it, or confirm it currently. There are a myriad of galaxies in the universe, but technology isn't advanced enough to extend to all it's reaches. [With a huff] Though I'm doubtful that there are any little green men out there... that's at least a work of fiction..

Considering I doubt that some of them even have a concept of reality, it would be a wasted effort.

[Really. That’s what he’s going to pick on as a ‘coincidence’?]

Obviously? And really not worth commenting on when earth’s just another word for dirt. A word with more than one meaning, what a surprise...

[HUFF.]

Just a thought, maybe you should pay attention to some of these people. Just ‘cause their reality’s different doesn’t make it less real.

You're failing to see the significance of the situation. If you are from another planet, shouldn't there be a linguistic difference between Meridian and Earth?

[Rolling his eyes at this buffoon]

Not unless there's a universal translation program in place that's confusing the issue...

[Gawd help us we're at the mercy of babelfish or google translate]

I could- or I could focus on getting back to where I belong and leaving all this, and you behind.

There probably is.

Don’t question the logic, it clearly doesn’t apply here. Everyone understood each other fine in Between too, just because they believed they could. This place seems to have the same flavour of stupid, so...

[Though Espio actually does speak English. It’s probably not called English, but it is indeed perfectly understandable English. No translation convention here.]

For someone professing to know better, you’re shockingly dense.

[Must. Prove. Idiot. Wrong...]

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