Let me Crawl Inside Your Veins (Wide Open)

[bridge_princess]

Who: Parsee bridge_princess and You!
What: February Open Log
Where: Pretty much anywhere
When: February (after the 8th)
Content Warnings: Body Horror, Blood, Roots and flowers growing in things like lungs and other places they don't belong. Probably some serious self loathing here

Prompts below!

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[bridge_princess]

[She coughed once into a cloth, grunting and wincing a little before shifting her seat so she wasn't facing Tifa. She didn't want to get the other woman sick, after all. there were some gifts you shared, some you didn't. So, she wedged herself into a corner on the train bench while the thunder outside rumbled softly. No hurry to get anywhere. She really didn't have anywhere to be, so why not just ride the train.

The question made her grimace some.]

Been feeling a little weird. I think it's the disease, but it might be something else. It's like I'm ... I don't. Almost like I'm floating in my own body. Trying to find a mooring to hook onto. Ever since the rite.

Which... might make sense? World might be figuring out exactly what I am. So it's not sure about that right now.

[There was something else. I was driving her to distraction, but she wasn't a girl comfortable about talking about her feelings with others. It might blurt out eventually, but she was as likely to swallow those feelings. Which, naturally, was the source of the current problem.]

[starshower]

[Tifa sighs, watching Parsee shift in her seat until she's almost staring at her back. Feels a little odd to be so distant, but it's for the best, right? Tifa, however, slides on the bench so that she's a touch closer than before. Close enough that she can speak a little softer.]

Well... This sickness feels like it came outta nowhere... No one really knows what to do about it, right? [The worry echoes loud in her uncharacteristically empty voice.] Wish there was something I could do to help.

[bridge_princess]

It's almost certainly something the Void's doing. So, it might be figuring out what being sick means for a lark?

[She managed a little laugh, even if it made her wince and looked over at Tifa when she slid in close. For a moment she thought about scooting again, but no. She could let her friend get a little closer. It was a pity that she probably couldn't help in this one case, if only because Tifa wasn't the girl that Parsee was falling for, not that she'd quite figured that out yet.]

You sure you want to be this close? I'm thinking it's not catching, but don't want to share it.

[starshower]

I'll be fine.

[So far, out of all the times that she's been around those who have fallen ill, she hasn't managed to catch it, thankfully. In any normal circumstance, she should have been sick ages ago, but she'll take what she can get, even if it's a small victory.]

You had me worried, you know... [It's Tifa's turn to laugh now, short and breathless, tinged with a little fear.] When you disappeared? Wasn't sure what to make of it.

[bridge_princess]

[That got a blink from her. Sure, she was finally getting to the point when she could call these people who kept showing up in her life friends. And she'd seen a fair bit of Tifa's life at points, so maybe it was normal, but it was so strange to know that someone was actually worried about her when she disappeared, besides Legion and Cole. She kind of had to expect that of them.

Her cheeks heated up and turned a shade of red when she looked back at Tifa.]

From what Legion says... I think we kind of have to get used to it happening once in a while. I'm not good with it, but I guess I'm not the only one. Sorry... I'm so not used to people worrying about me like that, Tifa. I... Uh... [Pause.]

Thanks. You n Cloud been ok? I haven't seen him around as much, but that feels normal. He seems like a 'keep to himself' sort.

[starshower]

[She's a little surprised—to say the least—when the topic turns around on her, and Tifa shifts in her seat.]

About as good as we can be. [Cloud really is a keep to himself sort of guy, but no matter how hard she tries, finding him something to do to keep him busy has been difficult. It's frustrating, but at least she can say that she gave it a shot.] Just trying to make it through the days... or whatever they are here... One at a time.

[...

Time to spin it back around—she doesn't like talking about herself much, and there's that pinch of curiosity looking to be satiated again.]

So. What happened when you went home?

[bridge_princess]

[They were both kind of avoiding talking about themselves. But, the part of Parsee's life she didn't want to talk about as much as here, not back home. So, when Tifa asked, she sighed and shrugged, setting her chin on her hand and thought about it. How did she really put this?]

A little bit of the same, but more monotonous. So... on the one hand? Nothing happened. I was back without memories for years. Nobody'd seen me disappear in the first place. So, I kept going about my days. By the bridge. Guarding when nobody came along...

But I suppose things were happening around me. Urban Legends from the outside world started showing up and people were talking about them, so some of the more people began pushing them to see which one came out on top. I blame boredom, but it was weird. Especially when I saw one here.

[starshower]

Urban legends?

[Things from an outside world showing up in hers... Sounds all too familiar, which is why Tifa perks up, wondering silently to herself if they're somehow related to the phenomenon they're experiencing in the Void.

A thoughtful look passes over her expression, like a lightbulb going off, but she doesn't think too hard on it yet, wanting to hear what Parsee has to say about them first.]

What do you mean from outside? Not from your world?

[bridge_princess]

Oh right that would get confusing here. [Sigh. She'd only partially explained.] Let's see... uh...

About a hundred years ago, give or take some change, spirits had a crisis. Humanity didn't believe in us much anymore, and it was starting to make us disappear. At the same time? We were going nuts, which made the few encounters violent. Few of the most powerful humans who still believed and most powerful youkai came up with a deal. They picked out the most remote valley ever and the youkai of boundaries created a barrier that set a boundary between the world of the youkai and humans who still believed and the rest of the world. Almost all of us spirits? We went into the Valley of Gensokyo.

So... these were folk stories from the outside world, which shouldn't be in my valley, much less hell? I 'think' some brat who was a witch was causing trouble at the boundary? Never got a clear answer. Reimu and I don't actually talk that much.

[Usually when she crossed the bridge and kicked Parsee's ass because that was normal.]

[starshower]

Right...

[Tifa isn't sure she fully understands the extent of all of that, but she thinks she gets the gist. She continues slowly, trying to repeat her thoughts out loud as best as she can.]

So, exile...? The youkai were moved somewhere else, away from the humans? Because they didn't believe in you anymore...

[bridge_princess]

Yeaaaah... more or less. And we need them to believe in us to keep existing properly in most cases. But, because a couple spirits have tricks and flit in and out sometimes, like Tanuki? Sometimes stuff from the outside world gets in.

...

Actually the whole "If you don't believe in me, I stop existing" thing, might help you? You remember I was letting people pray at the shrine, and you were suggesting I try and be something else, believing I could? It's... related. What you believe? How you treat a spirit? It can change them.

A bridge princess is still a bridge princess. But a youkai is what happens if a spirit is corrupted. So, what you've been helping try to do is to reverse that.