Does Anybody Really Know What Time it Is? (Open)

[bridge_princess]

Who: Parsee Mizuhashi bridge_princess and You!
What: Parsee Builds a Clock and tries to keep time
Where: Near the Bridge to Nowhere and Parsee's Shrine
When: A pretty lady looked at me and said her diamond watch had stopped cold dead....
Content Warnings: None other than Parsee's usual surly behavior is expected. Will update if necessary

(OOC: Note - Because the flow of time is not stable or normal, any attempt to measure time is doomed to failure. She's experimenting with that fact here.)

1) Do I look like a Horologist?
Parsee was standing there with a pile of what was quite literally just trash in front of her. Among these were a piece of long bamboo that she was adding a weight to and using one half of a pair of scissors to cut to a wedge on the other side. It kind of looked to anyone who might be paying attention like she was getting a small miniature aqueduct of running water ready to come from the stream, though what the point of this entire exercise might be was probably not immediately apparent.

Unless you were from Japan. The bamboo piece was sort of telling there. She was trying to make one of those Deer chaser fountains some people used as water clocks of a sort.

2) It ain't pretty, but...
The Shishi Odoshi was complete. Ok, the truth was that it looked awful. The bamboo piece, even cleaned up, clearly had seen better days but there wasn't any fresh bamboo. The whole construction was made with pieces that were not really designed from it. Old half rotten wood and rusted metal culverts did the job of coaxing water from the creek into position, and it was just kind of ugly to look at. But as the water started to flow down, trickling at a steady pace over the tip of the bamboo, the whole process began to work.

The water that filled the bamboo gradually changed its center of gravity until it pivoted, dumped the water into a channel leading back to the river and then fell back into position with a 'tonk' sound that scared a nug chicken in the distance away with a sqwuack. She put her hands on her hips and nodded in satisfaction. Only... about an hour later, if it was an hour later, she was staring at the thing with a look of mounting consternation.

"That's... That's not right."

3) The Doctor is In
Frustrated with the whole affair but unwilling to get the water clock to stop working, Parsee sat down with a thump beside her shrine, cleaning the scissors she'd used to help slice the bamboo and putting them back together before setting them in the shrine where they'd been offered originally. She squatted down next to the shrine and rubbed her forehead, the irritation apparent in her features. It wasn't adding up, and she didn't like how it was adding up.

But sitting beside the shrine, ostensibly doing her 'job' of waiting for prayers that would never come or people crossing her bridge was soothing in a way, so that was what she was going to do. And hey, these people were crazy enough that she could believe they might actually come to her looking for advice. One or two had already, god help them all. So, yeah... she'd wait and see.

Comments

[forwearemany]

Acknowledged. If necessary, additional designations can be assigned.

(For those places that don't have a name.)

[bridge_princess]

And in the end, they're hand painted signs, so... it's no harm to replace them. I'll see if I can find one of those furballs with the painted tails. They might be able to help out.

Might even want to.

[forwearemany]

We have been informed that the designation for the painters is Smeargle.

(They talk to the Pokemon people a lot.)

[bridge_princess]

Smeargles? I hadn't asked anyone tht yet. They seem pretty smart. Maybe i I call him a Smeargle, that'll help? Or would that annoy him?

[Give him a nickname after calling him Smeargle, silly.]

[forwearemany]

Uncertain. It is common for organics to prefer more personal designations.

(So a nickname might be a good idea, yeah.)

[bridge_princess]

Yeah, Humans tend to react poorly to being called "Hey, human" in my experience. Though they don't mind it the first time if you aren't and are obvious about it. Like the ears.

So maybe a nickname, which I suck at making up.

[forwearemany]

Affirmative.

(Legion originally had the opposite problem: people refused to simply refer to them as Geth.

Increasingly, they have come to identify with the name they were given.)

[bridge_princess]

[At the very least? It was a pretty good name, considering the source and referential nature of it. Still, definitely the opposite problem.]

You know, that sounds like a good idea in principle, but now I have to come up with a nickname for a furry little painter. You got any ideas maybe?

[forwearemany]

Forta is an Elcor artist whose works are said to be able to instill madness in those who stare at them for prolonged periods. There are also famous human artists such as Michelangelo, Picasso, and Vincent Van Gogh.

(Legion likes meaningful names.)

[bridge_princess]

.... Ok, so. Two things. One, what's an Elcor?

And two, even ignoring the fact that we're trying to just make sign posts, that's kind of a badass nickname. Little madness causer, heh. Bet one of them would love that.

[forwearemany]

An Elcor is a species of alien that evolved on a high gravity world known as Dekuuna. They are large, slow, and typically conservative in nature.

For most species, their voice sounds flat and monotonous, so the preface their sentences with the emotion they wish to convey.

(The opposite of the sort of creature one might expect to instill madness.)

Perhaps.

[bridge_princess]

So, let me get this straight. They're plenty emotional, but it doesn't come out in the words that they say, so they literally say. "Angrily. I wish to tell you how I feel about you?" That's...

...sort of refreshing, actually. But how do they convey it to each other?

[Actually, she'd buy it. Their method of emoting was outside of human comprehension. Like thinking in binary.]

[forwearemany]

With each other, they convey emotion with scent, extremely subtle body movements, and sounds below the Human range of hearing.

(Legion's galaxy of origin is just full of bizarre and fascinating creatures, isn't it?)

[bridge_princess]

That's...
uh...

That's kind of fascinating, actually. I... I wonder if I could feel the jealousy. Would I smell it in them? I... I w...wow, I wish one was here and my powers worked, just for a second. What does jealousy smell like in another person?

[For just a moment, she looked almost ... young. Not angry. Besieged by the possibility of something so strange and surreal, she was legitimately curious what such a thing would feel like.]

[forwearemany]

Perhaps one will arrive here.

(It's not necessarily likely, but it is possible, they think.

It occurs to them that this is the first time they've seen her so excited. Perhaps they should tell her more of their home galaxy and its inhabitants.)

[bridge_princess]

Never know...

[though considering how little was seen of them, it would almost certainly only happen as an imprint if they eve did. Still, she didn't sound like she expected it either.]

It would be interesting but I'm not putting money on seeing one. That'd be too convenient.

[forwearemany]

Perhaps.

(Their headflaps ripple.)

However, even if Parsee does not see an Elcor, it is likely other similarly alien forms of life will eventually appear.

[bridge_princess]

Yeah, I've already met some very unusual species after all. [She looked directly at Legion and winked.] There's bound to be something interesting.

[forwearemany]

(They chatter, noticing her wink.) Acknowledged.

[bridge_princess]

Say... out of curiosity...do you understand humor? I've been meaning to ask that for a bit. [Because amusement certainly didn't seem like something Legion got into too often.]

[forwearemany]

Our grasp of humor is, according to former allies, poor, though we have managed to cause amusement.

(Their humor heuristics need adjustment, apparently.

...They miss EDI.)

[bridge_princess]

Hehe. Yeah, you're kind of a perfect example of what they call the "Straight Man" of the joke. You're the one that the joke gets bounced off of. I could see it working real easily.

[forwearemany]

Our former allies commonly made jokes at our expense.

(They don't object to being a "Straight Man" per se...)

[bridge_princess]

You know... I like your former friends less and less the more you talk about them, Legion. No offense, but you kind of worked with some dicks.

[forwearemany]

Acknowledged.

(There were many, many good qualities of their Normandy pals, but well, betrayal tends to sour that and make the bad ones stand out. Namely all the smartass flashlight comments and similar things.)

They are no longer allies.