tabularasa_rp | (open) can't hold on or life won't change

I thought you just got jealous first, analyzed it later.

(If he's being honest.)

That depends on the person? Like any sort of jealousy. Sometimes, it's easy to get jealous. Like... there's people here I got jealous of the moment I met them. Before they said a word.

Others? I naturally look for reasons. Osomatsu, for example? I ... kind of had to look for it with him. Pretty hard.

(He doesn't have to ask whether Parsee is jealous of him, she has said it. He wonders about the others, and what exactly is it, but it's more morbid curiosity than something he truly needs to know.)

I see.

[She felt a little like explaining, though, so he might get an insight here. Leaning forward, she looked across at him from her knuckles and shrugged.]

Mebbe a little, but think of it this way. I 'am' jealousy so I have to intentionally tone it down and remember not to think that way, otherwise I will.

I see you, I figure out how you're smarter, prettier, more confident, more skilled, more anything than I am. As soon as I can, I figure out how you're better. And if you're like Oso? Kinda... not? In any way? Don't get me wrong. He's a good guy, just sorta pathetic sometimes? But if you're lower tier than me?

I'll figure out how you're handling it better. Better at coping, better attitude. [Hence Oso took work, but she found it. Guy embraced his state perfectly.] If I have a lot of trouble? It nags at me. nettles me. Can't shut it off until I really shove it down, or I find that thing. And then I home in on it.

Because jealousy makes me what I am... but trying not to do that? I ... uh... think I can here. It's just a thousand year old habit. Really really hard to break.

[In short, the answer to "Is she jealous of..." was "Yes." Unless it was Legion, and maybe Cole.]

[ Once she finishes her coffee, Yoshizawa figures the first order of business is to learn more about this place in which she's found herself. As much as she might want to on some level, she can't allow herself to rely on Ren all the time; she needs to understand more about the Void so that she can move around more freely on her own.

Perhaps it's ironic, but the best way for her to do that is to ask Ren to show her around. And so...

Maybe you find them in Heavenly Blanc, where the tour starts while she continues to inspect the signage. Or maybe they're in Wall Market, with Yoshizawa happily picking at the different types of sushi and barbecue meat as they wander around under the neon lights. Perhaps you find them at the Messiah Station Square, or the Shibumenosaki Underground Academy, both places similar to home and yet not. Or maybe they're somewhere else entirely - the Void has a lot of places to explore, after all!

Let the tour commence! ]

( Obviously, both Ren and Yoshizawa will be replying to this thread!! The more the merrier, though! )

I'm trying! [That's probably really not helping - but yes, he's also carefully not looking at any of the other art around them, to keep himself from thinking about the statue again.]

I don't think anybody would have expected any of this, though.

[Beyond just the mushrooms, he means.]

(He has been getting all sorts of note as of late, most of them rather inappropriate, so he instantly rolled his eyes upon seeing a piece of paper under his door. Surprise! It was not a "health tip" from Blue, but instead, an invitation.

Ren makes his way to the place - it feels like the more Phantom Thieves and related they get, the more familiar the Void gets, like their influence was getting stronger each time... And yet, it's never completely theirs. It's frustrating, somehow that blends into curiosity, much like everything does here.

He follows the sound of the piano, even if it leads him to different rooms with the inconsistency of it and finally, after almost feeling like he's partaking in a treasure hunt, he finds the other boy.

Ren beams, almost as if he was proud to see the skills he keeps hearing about and well, this is Leo in his natural habitat, isn't it? He doesn't mind waiting and listening until Leo is done.)

(He doesn't tower over her, but he is considerably taller. It makes it much easier for him to just narrow his eyes back in a stare, regardless of how much his cheeks burn, and cross his arms. Why is he glaring? Who knows. She started it. Don't worry about it. His brain broke, so this was pure defiant instinct.

And then she... Giggles? Ren is confused to the point his head tilts, blinking a few times and shaking his head in a futile attempt to lessen the redness.)

Nobody has ever accused me of those. (Murder? Yes, absolutely been assumed to have done it. Assault? Yep, he's been arrested on those charges. Admiring...? That is news.)

(Cleaning his glasses, Ren simply shrugs at the comment, still taking deep breaths not to resume the crisis.

Try not to think about a pink elephant, that sort of thing.)

At this point, we do expect new things to just pop into existence.

[ then ren sat there for hours (?), ignored and alone....... okay no. he will have to wait a while though -- however much a while might mean in this place -- because leo tends to ignore absolutely everything when music is involved. with one song done, leo moves to the next. there's no vocals paired with this piece, just a whole lot of piano keys, but when that's done leo is absolutely turning towards the door as if looking for something.

... and then he jumps a little, as it's found. briefly, his mind brings up the painful stuff he knows about ren now, shocking as it still is, but he shakes that away. the present is the present, and the past is the past, so maybe he'll just focus on the former-- ]

Woah! Whaaaat, Ren, you really live up to your name! I was expecting you and I still somehow ended up surprised!

[ PHANTOM THIEF, ]

Didja just get here? Sorry, sorry, I get waaay distracted when I'm doing music, so I didn't even hear the door open!

(It would be fine had that been the case! Ren finds a wall to lean his side against, arms crossed and the smile on his lips stands strong. He doesn't mind waiting when he's watching Leo have what seems to be the time of his life - basically what he envisioned it would be like when the other gets in contact with an instrument.

Ren himself jumps, just a little, when the other does - he didn't exactly come in stealth, hiding behind a piece of furniture and waiting for that precise moment in which he could make himself known.

So instead, he quietly laughs, shaking his head.)

I got here two songs ago.

(Leaving Heavenly Blanc in Blue's capable hands, Ren and Akechi make their way home. It's been a while by now and while it feels comfortable at this point, it's still a tad strange at times, just having the other right next to him at all times.

His routine ends up always the same - get home, remove shoes, water the plants, make coffee and now, he's lying on the bed, attempting to read this overly complicated book once again. Speed reading is great to get general concepts, but this requires a lot more attention and care for details than he can muster.

Finally, after rereading a line over and over, he caves with a frown.)

Goro, can you come here for a second?

Edited 2020-10-12 18:34 (UTC)

[Akechi quirks an eyebrow at Ren's assertion that he can mix, a wordless prove it. Because to Akechi's experience, Ren simply served him straight vodka, and both can attest it was absolutely terrible.

His gut clenches as Blue keeps speaking, and he can feel the burning heat of a flush creeping up the back of his neck as his gaze sharpens into a naked glare.]

I don't have any idea what you're talking about, but I can assure you, I'm not interested in opening the discussion.

[Fuck that!! Fuck that!!]

[If it's strange for Ren, it's doubly strange for Akechi. Akechi never had a cat at his side as a constant companion, or, well, anyone. More than once he considers just telling Ren that he'll stay in his own room for now; his shoulder isn't fine, but it's enough that he doesn't need the other boy constantly looking out for him.

But it's also nice, being able to stay with someone like this. Knowing without looking where the other boy is, hearing the sounds of him shifting or breathing. Akechi's seated at the desk with his notebook, gently tapping the end of the pen against his lips as he reviews notes he has memorized by now, jots down small pieces of things he remembers in case it becomes important later.

Maybe someday, the sound of his first name from Ren's lips won't make his heart leap in his chest. As it is, he keeps the weird little emotion from his face as he closes his notebook and glances over.]

What is it?

[He does not go there.]

Confusing wording.

(Ren admits, but while his voice is as neutral as ever, the expression on his face is less so, a frown for the book and a scrunched nose for reaching out for help.

Perhaps he should have read more back home, he ponders, but with how the library never quiets with the sound of whispering - a lot of them regarding him and just how strange it is that the kid on probation is actually interested in studying, almost as if he's like everybody else - Ren much prefers to sit down at LeBlanc during closing hours, when he's tired and it's late, or read on the way to school, a little at a time.

That is, if he can snag a seat in the train. So naturally, the book Akechi lent him takes longer for him to interpret without the practice of intense reading.)

Hm.

[He doesn't sound disappointed that Ren is asking for help, merely curious. It isn't like Akechi himself hadn't had to look things up when reading certain essays; context can be important, after all, and phrasing can be needlessly obtuse. Besides, discussing philosophy with Ren is infinitely more interesting than reviewing the same notes, over and over.

So he does finally come over to the bed, taking a seat on the edge and looking toward the book.]

Read it to me. Sometimes the simple act of hearing something aloud can assist in comprehension.

(While he speaks very little, Ren does have a good rhythm when he's wordier. It's simply something he picked up with Yoshida, through his public speaking tutoring, so, therefore, Ren reads, flawless in tone and flow.)

"Whosoever therefore out of a state of nature unite into a community, must be understood to give up all the power, necessary to the ends for which they unite into society, to the majority of the community, unless they expressly agreed in any number greater than the majority. And this is done by barely agreeing to unite into one political society, which is all the compact that is, or needs be, between the individuals, that enter into, or make up a commonwealth."

(And... Nope! That didn't help at all. If only, it made him more confused to the point he sits up, a hand combing his hair back as he attempts, one more time, to read this godforsaken line to himself.

??? Any number greater than the majority?? What do you even mean, John Locke?? Isn't that unanimity??)

(He sees the eyebrow, to which he just gestures, as to say ?, he told you he had nothing to mix it with in his apartment, Akechi!)

Seconded.

(He doesn't know if Akechi also gets the notes, but Ren surely does get a bunch of Sex 101 slipped under his door - while some are greatly helpful, he does not want them!!

So he's just as serious as Akechi, mostly to mask the embarrassment.)

[Ah, Locke. Okay. Akechi listens to him, then frowns and shifts closer. He doesn't rest his head on his shoulder or touch him, merely gets close enough to read the same passage himself.]

Don't focus too much on each individual word. [He gingerly shifts to get more comfortable, still careful not to use his left arm too much, and shakes his head.] When reading texts in translation, especially texts as old as these, it's best to simply attempt to find the main idea.

[He taps a gloved finger against the page.]

This is merely reinforcing his argument that for a society to exist, man must be willing to give up some of his individual power; it's impossible to reach an agreement otherwise.

How do you think that'll translate here?

(Aside from making Akechi happy, there's an underlying reason as to why Ren pays such attention to certain essays. The fact that they are here, only growing in population and property, surely means that soon, they'll have to start making rules and putting the gears to run smoothly as a society.

Gently, he closes the book, leaving the bookmark in place and making a mental note to remember where he had stopped, letting the hair go only for it to return to its usual puffy mess and lying properly with his bed against the mattress.

The book is important, sure, but listening to Akechi's opinion, one that is much more educated than his own, would be just as good. So go on, Akechi, you have his full attention.)

Edited (just an ' that shouldn't be there i hated it) 2020-10-12 20:33 (UTC)

It's difficult to say.

[It's not the first time he's thought about it, and there's a part of him that's pleased that Ren is thinking about it, too. He gets a bit of an approving nod at the question before Akechi rests his back against the pillows, gazing up at the ceiling.]

Right now, there isn't a single individual or group who has enough influence in our little "community" to try to amass power. There's no need to, either; resources are yet to become scarce, there isn't an external threat to fight or negotiate. We're fortunate enough that the majority of the people imprisoned here are from a more modern era, and not preoccupied with a divine right of rulers, either.

Without a lack of resources, there's no need to impose laws, and thus, no need for criminal punishment. "Theft" is difficult to define when personal possessions aren't something valuable to others, or more easy to acquire through means a modern person would consider legitimate, and other things are not "owned" by anyone.

[He trails off, clicks his tongue impatiently.]

In a way, we're fortunate that societal expectations of the people here tend toward peace, and a deviation from that is to be met with expected ostracization. Someone like Hornet, who doesn't have that kind of fear, can act with impunity. I, bound by the rules of my own society, can not.

[And here, he gives Ren a bit of a meaningful stare. If Ren weren't here, he would absolutely do his best to rip Hornet apart and test the full limits of this strange world's powers of regeneration.]

(Akechi is such a nerd, he can't help but think, but at this point? It's endearing, Ren enjoys listening to the other's thoughts, especially when he gets passionate - it's like watching someone in their natural environment, and Ren, for one, feels like he learns about Akechi a little bit more each and every time.

Ren listens, nodding in agreement to all words until that last bit hits his ears, accompanied by the stare. Shifting his position to his side, Ren tentatively takes the gloved hand to rest on the palm of his own, eyes locked on it before he returns the gaze to the other.)

That's not why you're not retaliating. (Akechi, please. Rules of your society or rules of your Ren?)

Perhaps.

[He doesn't flinch when he meets Ren's eyes, only frowns.]

We've currently no way to impose meaningful punishment other than "eye for an eye." There is no jail, no legal system, nor even an easy, more... permanent solution.

[He doesn't hold Ren's hand back, but nor does he pull away, either.]

Any action I take will be reflected on you. You have realized this, yes? The majority thinks very highly of you, and that isn't a position I'm willing to risk.

[For practical reasons, if nothing else.]

(Akechi has never been exactly under Ren's command. Even when he was working alongside, he still had his own agenda and taking Ren as a leader was a fleeting experience. Ren knows he couldn't exactly keep Akechi from doing whatever he feels like doing, he can only opine and ask... And for the reasons given, he has yet to see an insect skull lying around in the Void.

The hand is taken to his lips, a kiss upon the leather as he thinks. Akechi isn't exactly reciprocating, but Akechi's not pushing Ren away, no "stop that", so, as sad as it is, Ren is fine with it.)

I'm not so sure anymore. (There's so much about him, his arrest, his record, his trauma just bleeding out in the open that he isn't quite sure what people are thinking of him as of now.

He's just used to expecting the worst.)

[Getting this far into Messiah was difficult at best, with that insect on constant patrol. Somehow Kaiba had managed to avoid her thus far. Like it or not he was making it his business to keep up to date on all the oddities that appeared in the void. Admittedly, he'd put this one off for a while and after seeing what it had to offer- he hadn't regretted the earlier decision. Of all the useless, out of the way time sinks.

He was descending one of the staircases carefully as water cascaded all around his expensive boots. He halted when he heard something from above]

Voices... down here?

[Why would anyone seek this place out? Intentionally? Grumbling, he debated continuing downward or heading back up to see who could be so foolish.]

(open) can't hold on or life won't change

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VOID TOUR @ here, there, and everywhere!

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cuddling edgelord

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Messiah Station Square