tabularasa_rp | [open] a day in the life of a ghost

[Figuring out how to help Akechi without seeing into his mind has been difficult, but he's starting to get an idea of why that is, in a way. Cole had been hesitant to spar with him as part of his agreement to teach him to use daggers, but Akechi had no such reservations. He wouldn't be the first person he'd met who enjoys fighting, whatever the underlying reasons may be. Still, he's not usually anyone's sparring partner. But he tries his best.]

[It's when they take a break that he comments on it, leaning against a tree behind Heavenly Blanc.]

Do you like fighting?

[Fighting without exhaustion as he's accustomed to feeling it is almost dangerous, in a way; Akechi suspects if he keeps going well beyond what should be a normal stopping point, he'll end up injuring himself through simply by overusing his muscles. So eventually, he calls for a break, pushing sweaty hair away from his eyes. He'd tied his hair back, as usual in deference to the unpredictable wind, but it didn't keep his bangs from sticking to his forehead.]

Hm? [He glances to Cole mid-sip of water. He'd taken one of the glasses from Heavenly Blanc, reasoning that even if they technically didn't feel thirst, he should probably at least make an effort to train normally.] I do.

[He sets the glass down and tugs off the cloth he'd wrapped around the blade Cole had lent him in the interest of safety, examining the blade. He didn't need the spirit worried that he'd get hurt, after all; it would take all the fun out of this sparring match if the other boy held back.]

Does that bother you?

[Cole is fine making no effort to pretend he needs things like water, so he just watches Akechi go through the motions. Nothing changes in the way he looks at him when he answers. He just shakes his head faintly.]

No. It helps, to know that about you. Maybe I can try harder to fight back.

[Because he still was holding back a bit, even with the wrapped blades. This may just be a form of training, but he doesn't want to hurt him, intentionally or not. But if a good fight is what Akechi likes, then holding back won't help him.]

Please do.

[Akechi runs a gloved hand down the center of the knife, pressing his thumb briefly against the sharpened edge as if to test it without slicing. It's a different style to Ren's knife, but they're similar enough that it's not hard to adjust for it. Experimentally, he gives the blade a toss from his left hand to his right, testing the grip in his off hand as well.]

If it comes to a real fight in the future, I will need to be able to hold my own. Going easy on me will instill me with a false sense of my own skills. Therefore, the harder you fight, the more you're helping me learn.

[He watches him test out the dagger. He can't argue with his logic, not that he needs more convincing to try and help him this way. Though Akechi must already know how to fight, since he likes fighting. He certainly doesn't handle the knife like he's never held a sharp weapon before, either.]

When you fight, what weapon do you normally use?

A sword.

[Akechi tosses the knife back to his left hand, pushes off the wall he'd been leaning against, and holds the dagger straight out in front of him, the same way he'd hold a sword as if challenging someone.]

I suppose the proper term would be saber or rapier. One-handed, lighter weapons meant for finesse, but still with enough substance to slice or rip an enemy apart.

[Like, sure, traditionally those kinds of swords aren't meant for ripping, but Akechi is a special boy.]

Tell me, did you choose daggers for a reason, Cole-san?

[Swords, okay. That's why he seems used to bladed weapons already. Unfortunately he doesn't have any insight to impart on using a dagger versus a sword, since he's never used a sword and he can barely explain how to use a dagger without just showing by doing either.]

[As for his question,]

It was what he had, his mother's dagger. If someone or something needs to die, it's the right shape to cut into the heart or throat. I've never had a reason to use anything else.

[He's definitely just a nice harmless compassion spirit.]

"He?"

[Unfortunately, Akechi can't let something like that go. He understands the latter part, at least; a dagger is an efficient weapon for getting up-close-and-personal with one's enemy to ensure that they're dead. It's a very thorough way of fighting.

But still, curious that Cole, of all people, has that opinion.]

The real Cole.

[He has no reason to keep his past secret, even if he isn't always exactly thorough about explaining it.]

Did you choose swords for a reason?

[They're hardly an uncommon weapon in his understanding, but Akechi asked him first, so.]

It's the proper balance between reach, lethality, and guard.

[It's a lie, but an easy one. He's not going to admit that as a child, he'd wanted to be like the heroes on TV, the science-fiction escapism of a laser saber seeping into his personality and awakening along with his Persona. The fantasy of being a dashing swordsman, able to take on any foe, alone, like the novels he'd read and the movies he'd seen.

No. That's not anyone's business.]

You know, part of assuming another identity is not to reveal it so easily, [Akechi remarks. He already knows Cole is some kind of spirit... ghost... Shadow... entity, so it doesn't surprise him as much as it should that Cole is someone else.] What happened to him?

[It's a lie he easily accepts. It sounds true enough, if not at all enlightening on a personal level. But again, swords are a common choice.]

Why not? I didn't know, at first. I made myself forget, until the Lord Seeker proved I wasn't real.

He was locked away and forgotten by the Templars. [His tone shifts to one of distress, as if acting out the emotions of the words despite his posture remaining calm.] Afraid, alone, guts aching, cold stone stings my skin as I c-cry out, nothing calls back but dark and dread.

[And then he's fine... mostly. It's harder to push aside his own feelings attached to this when the silence makes everything in his own head seem louder.]

I heard him. I came through to help, but... I couldn't. I held his hand as he starved to death.

...

[Well, that does answer several questions, even as it brings up several more. Akechi brushes his sweaty hair back and takes another drink of water to buy himself time to digest all of that, because hm. Yikes. He might not understand some of the titles (Lord Seeker?) but he's familiar with the idea of templars from history, at least.]

So you took his form and his belongings?

[Cole seems fine to let the silence hang while Akechi drinks more water. The memories aren't painful in exactly the same way that they were before he remembered more of what he is, but they're still... hard to carry, sometimes.]

I became him. But the him he wished he were, no magic, harmless, so no one would hurt him anymore.

[Not that he exactly turned out harmless, but he's not any kind of mage. He lifts his wrapped blade between his hands, toying with a bit of loose fabric.]

I couldn't save him, then I forgot things that I shouldn't have. I can't let that happen again.

Well. At least he didn't die alone. Sometimes that's all you can do for a person.

[Akechi has some experience with that, though his face is a carefully composed mask as he studies Cole's. Alone, bleeding out, nothing around but monsters and a puppet wearing his face for company? Yeah, not recommended.]

People with magic are hated where you come from, I take it?

Edited 2020-08-17 16:37 (UTC)

...Yes.

[It was all he could do, in the end. It wasn't enough.]

[He lifts his head enough to look at Akechi from under his hat. He wonders how it is for people with magic in his world, especially if there is no Fade there.]

Many fear mages. Sometimes because they have magic, like his father did. You’ve evil in you, boy, passed down by your mother. You’ll pay the price just as she did.

But everyone is scared of demons, and what happens when a demon possesses a mage. That's what the Templars were supposed to be there for, to protect people from that.

[The situation with Templars and mages now is even more of a mess, but that's how the Templars were meant to be at the time, whether or not they fulfilled that role.]

[Everyone's scared of demons, is it? Something about that quirks the corner of Akechi's lip into a humorless smile. By definition, the majority of Ren's Personas are demons. One could even make the broad argument that any of their Personas could be considered a demon, if the definition were widened enough.]

If you're saying that's what these Templars were supposed to be there for, it's safe to assume that they overstep their bounds? Those in power often do.

[The police, the government. His smile fades into a subtle irritation at the thought.]

The Cole you met... they thought he was possessed, and thus locked him up to die?

Not all Templars wanted to hurt mages. But some were afraid, and others liked having that power, and using it to hurt them.

[It's probably for the best he doesn't elaborate on that.]

No. They locked him up because was an apostate who had hurt people. [Would Akechi know what that means?] He was a mage, but he wasn't in a Circle, where the Templars could decide if he was a danger or not. If they decided yes, then he probably would have been made tranquil, so he couldn't be possessed... or hurt anyone.

[Some believe that's a fate worse than death, though.]

But they forgot he was there. When they found his body, they made it look like he never existed to bury their mistake.

[This sure is a cheery conversation. Cole doesn't seem to mind answering his questions though, his moments of discomfort aside.]

[Fortunately, Akechi doesn't require the elaboration. He has enough familiarity with abuse of power to draw his own conclusions, and he only nods, taking another drink of water while he listens.

It's... odd, to listen to someone else open up. That kind of thing doesn't normally happen to him; it's Ren's jurisdiction, not his. But it's all useful information about someone who could become an enemy in the future, and as long as Cole is willing to talk, Akechi will continue to listen.

There sure is a lot of jargon though. Time for a vibe check.]

You're saying that where you're from, those with magic are feared and often hated, and are placed under guard in special areas -- like a wizards' tower, or school, perhaps? -- for the protection of others. The punishment for being a danger is to have one's magic removed, yes?

[That's the only guess he can hazard as to what "tranquil" is supposed to mean, but it seems accurate, though it does raise the question as to why their society wouldn't simply render all mages tranquil from birth.

The cover-up, at least, requires no additional explanation. His lips curve down into a frown. Sloppy.]

Those in power often will find a way to absolve themselves of blame, especially those in the public eye. I trust you killed them for their carelessness?

[Like, that's what he would do if he were a vengeful ghost. And let's be real, isn't that exactly what he is?]

[They were harrowing events at the time, but he's more detached from that now. Now that he knows what he is, it's easier to be more like that, instead of what he was. What happened then may as well have happened to someone else- some of it quite literally. Though it's not always easy to keep it that way.]

It's usually a tower, I think. The White Spire is. There's more of them... or there were.

The Rite of Tranquility isn't removing magic. It's... [Describing the Tranquil is difficult, when they can't feel.] It takes away more than that. It locks away every part of you that lets you touch the Fade. Tranquil can't use magic, or dream, or feel anything at all. No more fear, despair, or loneliness... or joy, or desire.

[He'd thought that didn't sound so bad, once upon a time.]

[Akechi's second question hits a sore spot, one he usually tries to forget. The bitterness leaks into his voice.]

No. I don't remember which one did it, or I think I would have.

[Even if he remembered more, his memories from that time aren't all clear. As he was then, he's sure he would have killed whoever personally left Cole there. Now... he tries not to think about it. It doesn't help to think about it.]

Hm. That's too bad.

[Regarding killing the men in question, that is. Making those that made you suffer is something that Akechi would never quite be willing to give up, not for any cost. He'd die to exact vengeance.

But being made Tranquil... there's a deep-seated revulsion to the idea, some of his from his own Personas reacting to the very idea.]

Removing a human's desires is to destroy who they are as a person.

[His hands grip the almost-empty glass of water more tightly as he stares at Cole, obviously disturbed at the very idea. If he didn't like the concept of stealing hearts, this is indescribably worse.]

This was a common punishment in your world? I can think of few fates worse than death, but that is certainly one of them.

[Maybe. He was able to stop Lambert from hurting mages like Rhys anymore, at least. But he didn't have anything to do with Cole.]

[Desire. He'd said something about that before, hadn't he?]

Yes. There are a lot of people who feel that way, too. There was a Tranquil who found out how to fix himself, but a demon took him and killed everyone. The Templars wanted to make him tranquil again. He wanted to die instead.

[In otherwords, even the Tranquil might prefer death, if they were capable of it.]

I don't think it's as common anymore, now that the mages rebelled and the Elder One turned the Templars red.

[Medieval fantasy life is wild.]

[Akechi hums again, quiet as he digests that information, processing it into terms he's more familiar with. Even if the vocabulary isn't something he's accustomed to, the concepts are nothing new or beyond his comprehension.]

And I'm sure after he was possessed by a demon, these Templars were only too happy to oblige his dying wish.

[He taps a fingernail against his water glass, still turning over the concept.]

To paraphrase Jefferson, the tree of liberty must be watered with the blood of patriots and tyrants. "Freedom" is a curious concept in our world, most people bound by chains invisible and figurative, but no less binding than those you speak of.

What do you think about all this, Cole-san? Being a spirit yourself, I'm sure mages must be of special interest to you.

The Templars didn't kill him. He asked me to, but I didn't. I knew that it would make Rhys unhappy. Someone else did.

[The Jefferson stuff goes almost completely over his head. The part about chains sounds right, though.]

[What does he think? He's not sure if "special interest" is how he would say it, but...]

Being a spirit doesn't matter. I don't want to possess anyone. Knowing I'm a spirit helped me to be more like one, but I'm still me.

I think that forcing someone to be Tranquil if they don't want it is wrong. It takes away the pain, but it takes more than that, too much. There should be some other way to help.

[Whatever that may be. He takes these things on a case by case basis.]

[open] a day in the life of a ghost

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