tabularasa_rp | (open) where have you been? been searching all along 𝅘𝅥𝅮

... I'm from the country. There aren't many schools like that. Can you tell me more?

(Again, it was not like he was school-hunting whatsoever back in Tokyo. Shujin was the only school that accepted him after he was expelled and honestly? Maybe it had been for the best. He wouldn't have met his friends if he went to any other school - save Yusuke's or Akechi's.

But maybe taking a look at how Leo's life was like back home was a way to glimpse at how he translates himself here.)

Eh. How so?

(He snorts.)

I'm not even sure if our schools exist in our respective universes, speaking of.

[ hahahahaha, wait a second here. ren's certainly getting a look from leo with his questions as he stops walking -- something resembling muted playfulness written on his face as he turns to face his companion.

now, leo's... not against divulging details about his life. not at all! he's something of an open book, in some respects, but some of these questions were more intimate. isn't that a little unfair? when all he knows of ren is just about the people surrounding him, kind of, and that's he's good with a knife? ]

Hey, Ren. You're the giving type, but... In this kind of situation, you really do like to just take, don'tcha?

[ not that he's truly mad about it. it's just something he has to say, something he's noticed. leo's gaze is sharp, vibrant green eyes observing ren carefully, though there's still the same smile on his face.

he tilts his head a little. then: ]

I'll let you know now -- I'm not gonna cut myself open for someone who's only ever gonna give me scraps!

(Eh?

Ren haults, brows furrowed in response to both the expression and the fact that they were no longer going ahead in their journey. What surprised him the most was the comment, like he couldn't understand exactly what Leo meant when he mentioned just take. Is he talking about the cakes--

Ah. That.

Leo has a very interesting way of twisting the knife, it's playful and it seems in good nature, but Ren definitely can see through it. He takes a deep breath before he sighs.)

... What would you like to know?

(There's your opening, Leo. Use it wisely.)

[ leo tsukinaga Always Gets What He Wants.

except for a break from misery but it's fine. he thinks maybe he'd gone a little bit too hard there, but he always was the worst at handling these kind of things with subtlety. you could say he constantly goes straight for the throat? it's terrible. he might feel a little bad for it, if it weren't for the fact that they'd probably have to address this eventually.

he likes ren. likes him a lot! is he gonna mess this up somehow by going Too Leo Too Fast? that would suck, wouldn't it, ah-- ]

Wahahaha! Now that you asked me that... I'm figuring out that all those questions I had are betraying me and running away when I need 'em most...! [ he almost hadn't expected it to be that simple? he can't help but laugh. ] I don't wanna push you or anything. I wanna be friends, y'know? But I can't be friends with someone I won't ever know, especially not here.

[ everything's changing. unpredictable! there's an extra layer of trust that has to be there in a situation like this, he thinks. ]

I guesssss... Why're you so careful about showing me you, huh?

[ he respects that. ren's privacy, that is, but... if his comrade's giving him the go ahead to tear away at some of it, leo's not going to hold back. ]

Edited (oh my god im sorry i just reread this wording and cried) 2020-08-20 01:41 (UTC)

There are parts of my life and myself that aren't relevant here. I don't want it to be.

(Parts, plural.

The void didn't take his criminal record with him. It never mattered if he did commit any of the crimes he was accused of, so would it really not matter here?

Give people a reason to distrust you and they will do it - it's over. And it's not like the list stopped at assault, now that all was said and done... He was just about to agree to turn himself in when he blinked and found his surroundings to be blank and empty, and now ever-changing.

While he is much proud of the Phantom Thieves and all they have accomplished, he also doesn't feel like explaining himself. His motivations, his actions, the reasons. The stories. It also comes with the fact that explaining anything about that bit comes with outing Akechi as well. Not willing to do that, for the sake of peace and Akechi's well-being.)

I see!

[ it makes sense, he thinks! a whole new world that doesn't have anything to do with what you were in the past, what you did in the past... you don't really need to drag anything up if you don't want to.

but, leo sort of disagrees with that? because: ]

... That's a funny sounding phrase though! "Parts of myself aren't relevant here"! How's a part of yourself suddenly not become relevant? You're here, so of course all of you is relevant! Did you somehow hack yourself into pieces and only end up getting half-kidnapped?! How'd you manage a funny thing like that, Ren!

[ he. does not mean that literally. obviously.

he's just of the opinion that nothing that anyone ever did or is becomes irrelevant just because of a location change, or company change. if you're gonna say you're "you", and try to connect with people like that... you can't pick and choose the pieces you're gonna show. ]

(Hah! Great argument! Leo gets points ♪♪ and a laughter out of Ren. Maybe they should sit, so Ren squints behind the glasses, just to check if there's a tree or somewhere comfortable where they can actually talk this out. Standing here in the middle of nowhere just isn't comfortable, so he guides them towards one and sits under the shade.

The knife is no longer being fidgeted with, but it rests on Ren's side, easy to pick up should anything pose a threat to them.)

Let me put this another way. I know the pieces don't fit.

(Specially after he saw him and Akechi psycho sparring and heard his codename loud and clear. He cannot just continue posing as a teen barista after that, can he?)

I know it's not enough or even a satifying answer, but I do have good reasons and you can trust that much.

[ he'll follow along behind ren, taking the hint to get a little more comfortable. as ren settles down and puts down his knife, leo's. leo's going to be absolutely terrible and reach over to nab that weapon, testing for permission by seeing if ren will actually allow him to do that.

he's been curious for a little bit, okay, and he's the impulsive sort who'll take an opportunity offered to him regardless of the context--

ah, but, where were they again...? right. ]

I'm pretty gullible! Even with the little I know you... Yeah, I can say I trust you. Silly me, right?

[ he says, as he's now clutching a KNIFE. but that's mostly for his own amusement, as he focuses on it in his hand, moving it slowly back and forth. he's not gonna fiddle with it fancily like ren does, of course. he's not an idiot. mostly. he'd like to keep his fingers. ]

But it doesn't mean I have to like it! It's like you're underestimating me... since where's the trust in return, huh?

(While he allows Leo to take the knife, it'd be a lie to say he's not paying attention to Leo handling it. It's sharp, enormous and dangerous, so he is focused on that until Leo speaks again.

He perks up, eyebrows raising with him before a long breath and a sigh...)

Fine.

(Congratulations, Leo, you played the right cards.)

I'm serving probation. (For starters.) I was wrongfully convicted.

Edited 2020-08-20 03:17 (UTC)

[ thanks for looking out for him, ren-mama. fortunately he's good enough at not accidentally stabbing himself, given his experience with integrating swords into their choreography...

... but, um, his gaze is definitely leaving the knife now that he's actually getting information out of ren. leo wasn't really sure where this was gonna go, to be honest. if it was going to end with ren leaving, ren avoiding the topic some more, or... him losing one of his closer friends here?

maybe he was just a bit anxious without knowing it. the small weight in his chest that he hadn't been aware of lightens a tad, and in it's place is a fraction of surprise at what he's told.

well... it's something, but it's also not the whole pie, he knows. one step at a time, he's already pushing a bit too much-- ]

Exceeeept that doesn't mean much in the court of public opinion.

[ he figures ren had a bit of a Time. leo definitely doesn't blame him for wanting to not want to deal with that section of himself at all.

he's placing the knife back at ren's side. look, you fake felon, he trusts you enough to give you your weapon back. even with the crazy fight loving persona he was shown that is still the subject of Questions in his head.

don't be greedy, leo. one thing at a time. ]

It's easy to be misunderstood in a society like this. Like, if someone gets an image in their head, everything you do is gonna end up being colored by that image... [ he knows. he had his own time of it, though he doesn't feel as if that's comparable to something criminal? not that it's something to be compared. ] ... I can see why you'd hide that! I'm not gonna bother trying to say sorry about forcing that outta you, we both have the same feelings about fake apologies. All you gotta know is that you're still the same Ren to me.

[ relevant or irrelevant parts or fake felonies or whatever else ren's hiding in there. leo knows he's a good guy, and he's certain he's not wrong about that one! ]

(He didn't have his knife, or a pen, or anything to keep him occupied while the finally unleashes a small, but incredibly relevant piece of himself, so here he is, curling the tip of his hair while he awaits for Leo's input.

No expectations that Leo will believe him, though. It's one thing to say it, another is to prove it, and right now, Leo did bear witness to a scene that could probably be out-of-context enough to disqualify his words... So he's already here, preparing himself to hear anything about how unlikely that is, that he doesn't get to just say it and have it believed.

It's not Leo, though. It's just the trauma that built up... But then, Leo tells him otherwise. Ren's eyes goggle at the words, and how genuine they sound. While he isn't certain on to what extent he believes Leo is fine with it, it surely felt nice to hear it.)

You said it. Thanks.

(Give him a moment, but he finally speaks again.)

Please keep it to yourself. Only you and Akechi know.

Nah. Thanks to you for going along with getting pushed, and sharing that piece of yourself with me. The least I can do is keep that secret to my grave.

[ ... and not misunderstand him like he's already been misunderstood, because that's just sad. he's taking "keep it to yourself" to the absolute extreme... though it's not an exaggeration at all. a word of this won't leave his mouth, ever, whether he's here, or home, or anywhere else.

leo brings his knees up, settling his hands there idly as he hums in thought. ]

You wanna return the favor or anything? I can give you a break from my being nosy if you want!

[ it's a sharing session. wow, real friendship. ]

(All he can really do is nod, a small but sincere hint of a smile on the corners of his lips. He hopes Leo keeps his promise, something tells him he will.)

I did ask you a question about your school, if you want to answer that.

('If' being the keyword here. Finally, he takes the dagger in his hands, inspecting to check whether it needed to be sharpened.)

Other than that, I'm not sure what to ask.

Now you know how I felt! Having that much power leaves the mind blank!

[ ""power"".... but it sure is. being able to ask any question at all about someone is a powerful, powerful thing, and having too many options just blanks your mind! super overwhelming!

... or maybe there's just nothing to ask, who knows. he wiggles his knees a little, piecing together the explanation in his mind. ]

But sure, I'll answer that. I'll answer whatever the heck you wanna ask! It's only fair!

[ for putting ren in the fcking hot seat and basically forcing the words out of his curly, furry head. ]

Mmmm... If I had to put it in the simplest way possible, Yumenosaki's an arts school. It's got a special program for idols and some other stuff... We've already talked about this different Japans business, so I doubt you've ever even heard of it!

I wouldn't know even if there was one in my Japan.

(And for a multitude of reasons! Schools were not exactly lining up to enroll him, he was new to Tokyo and... Why would he look up special programs for idols?)

Why did you become an idol?

(That. That is a question he'd much like to listen the answer to.)

[ haha, maybe. yumenosaki's prestigious enough that leo thinks its existence would have reached ren's ears, maybe, but he's not sure.

but there's the other question, and leo has to pause over it. unexpected... ren's sure getting right to the heart of leo. it's a question he lost the answer to, in the past -- he's much more confident in this now, so it only takes that tiny bit of silence for the response to come, earnest and simple: ]

It's fun!

[ but leo says it like there's a little more to it. he continues as he stretches his legs out, choosing not to give a short answer when ren finally responded to his questions. ]

My little sister used to get really happy when I pretended to be an idol around her. I don't needa say I love music, right? Smiles like that are on that same level of love for me! Somewhere down the line, I thought: hey, you genius! You can mix the two!

[ making people smile. making music from those smiles. then making people smile with that music some more. it's like a horrible feedback loop.

it didn't end up being so simple, so pure, but he's still happy he chose to be an idol. ]

Don't think that I wasn't happy with just making Ruka-tan smile! [ stop the siscon ] Ruka-tan's smile is the best! There's just a whole wide world out there, okay?!

[ a wide world with people like his unitmates and ren in it, where he can make them laugh! and, in return, he finds his own happiness-- ]

(The smile Ren gives Leo grows as he listens. From the little that he knows from idol life, perhaps it's core could be different from what Leo wanted when he started becoming passionate about music.

There's the aesthetic, the promotions, the press, the fangirls... A time when he went out with Akechi and messed up his hair, using his glasses as a disguise comes to mind and he laughs a little to himself. Surely seemed like being a celebrity had its ups and downs...

But there's a strong resolve from Leo on his passion, so Ren doesn't see it like he cares too much about the negative parts of his career choice.)

You're a good big brother.

(He smiles! There you go, Leo! ♪♪♪)

[ pfft. ren's got a pretty smile, doesn't he? all this talk about making people laugh has that being the first thing he notices. with all the difficulties he's sure to have had, it's nice that ren hasn't lost that, at least...

... there's one on leo's face, too, but it's just the slightest bit wry when that statement comes out. ]

Nah. I caused a lot of trouble for her, you know? Ruka-tan's the good egg!

[ the best egg. honestly, thinking he's better now doesn't erase what he'd done in the past. he'll move past it, try harder, but it doesn't change that.

leo taps his boots together, as if that's just a casual, idle fact. mmm, that aside-- ]

What about you, Ren? You got any siblings?

None.

(He does have a few brotherly bonds, though. Futaba being the easiest one to name if so needed.

Ren wants to find every single of the Phantom Thieves if they made it, each new location triggering new worries that someone is there... And Futaba just happens to be the one he is in most despair about not finding quickly enough.

You know, maybe because she's was a shut-in. With severe anxiety. Who is very much dependant on her computer. And the youngest of all 8 of them.)

Do you think more people might arrive?

(Ren knows Leo can't read his mind to get the infobomb, but also... It's fine.)

[ oh! he blinks at that, recollects himself, then: ]

... I dunno. Maybe.

[ it's not a useful answer, he knows, but the truth is he doesn't know. why would he say something that he can't be sure of?

part of him wants the answer to be yes, because if he's not going to be able to leave just yet there's people he wants to see again... but he's also not sure if he wants to be selfish enough to drag them all out of the business of getting their shit together for himself.

ah, what a conundrum. ]

Thinking about some not-in-blood-family you miss? That's what I'm guessing, anyway, since you pulled out that random question after I asked about siblings!

[ he can't read minds, but he can reference context well enough sometimes... at least. ]

Edited (where are my words ) 2020-08-20 22:40 (UTC)

(Out of his head, Leo! Ren squints in response, but after, he nods. He is blessed to have someone with him, even if their relationship is complicated to say the least. A lot of people didn't have this luxury, like the boy in front of him and many others he has spoken to... )

The people Akechi told you about and others. We've been looking, but no success on that.

(He's on the same position. Wouldn't want the Thieves to be here at all, but if they were, he has to know.)

[ leo: i will stay here in your head forever ren

okay, he figured that those two that akechi mentioned before would be in that group... he doesn't remember their names clearly (given his inability to remember names of people he meets directly, it's not a surprise that he can't recall the names of people mentioned off-hand), but he thinks they were his best friends? maybe that's what akechi said? something of a found family for ren, he assumes, like the way knights was for him.

hmm. ]

... You wanna tell me a little about 'em? I can keep an eye out too, in case they ever show up.

[ three pairs of eyes better than two and all... ]

We're eight.

(And he could write a book about each of them.)

Takamaki Ann.

(He is under no expectation that Leo will remember the names Akechi gave them when they pose no importance to Leo himself, but at least he will give him her full one just in case.)

You'd recognize her easily. She's a model, Japanese, with blue eyes and blonde hair. She's one I think you'd get along the most.

[ wow, eight...

there's a thought of his that he can't leave unvoiced as he hears about that, and that's: ]

I'm glad you found such a big place, Ren!

[ despite everything. truly. ]

Anyway, I think I remember you saying I'd get along with someone in particular a little bit ago... That was her, I guess? Why d'you think that?

(He smiles too, a little. They're his family after all.)

It's her and Yusuke Kitagawa.

(That would be it. He can see Leo and those two becoming best friends in a matter of seconds.

Yusuke with his ART and Ann with her easy-going personality.)

Same vibe on both accounts.

Edited 2020-08-25 16:39 (UTC)

(open) where have you been? been searching all along 𝅘𝅥𝅮

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