tabularasa_rp | (closed) rivers in the deseeeeeeeeeert

[When Akechi finally wakes, it's very quick. The pitch blackness around the boy on the bed is blasted away as his eyes snap open and he jerks upright, inhaling a ragged breath and staring with wide, frightened eyes. He doesn't scream, he doesn't make a sound other than gasping for breath like he'd been drowning; his chest aches, his head hurts, his mouth is painfully dry. He sucks in a breath and coughs on it, almost choking. Without realizing, his hand has clutched tightly around Ren's, fingernails biting into the back of his hand as he tries to make sense of what's happening arund him.]

(With how intense Akechi's awakening was, it was almost impossible for Ren not to wake up right along. After all, there's the assault of the light, the choking and the nails almost drawing blood.

He almost jumps awake, instinctively holding the hand that squeezes his own back before his brain properly wakes up- at least it was quick. Ren then takes the glass of water sitting on their nightstand to offer, sitting next to the other to offer support while Akechi rides the revival off.

He knew he would make it.)

Welcome back.

[For a long several seconds, he just stares at Ren, eyes wide and breath shaky. After the nothingness, after the hellfire, everything seems far too normal, everything feels like far too much. He yanks his hand away, bare skin feeling like its on fire as he tries to make sense of his surroundings.

Another few seconds as he forces himself to calm his breathing, staring at the water as if confused by the concept before looking back to Ren. Ren. He's alive. Akechi has to keep it together, if for no other reason than he refuses to break down in front of the other boy.

So he takes the glass, draws on every ounce of his willpower to smooth his face into something normal.]

What... [he starts, swallows against a dry throat, and shakes his head, forcing his expression into its usual closed-off neutrality.] What happened?

(Ren knows better by now. He knows the last thing Akechi needs is to be held, to have overwhelming attention around him, so Ren halts the impulse to hug him. It has been three days - but for Akechi, only merely seconds, and Ren gives him his space, his time to process being back, in their room.)

That thing killed you and Loki took over. (No reason to dance around it. No reason to unleash his upsetness on Akechi as of right now, either.)

Loki did...?

[He scowls and takes a sip from the water glass, fighting the urge to just down the whole thing. That could be a problem. Loki is the parts of himself that he wants to hide at all costs.

But what's done is done. First things first, he needs information. The lack of other noise is his first hint; a glance around at the otherwise-deserted room confirms his suspicions.]

How long was I out?

He did. I trailed him as much as possible, but he lost me a few times.

(For the exact reason Akechi is thinking.

Usually, asking about 'how long's is an empty question with no possible answer to be found in the Void. Right now, however, many things have changed while Akechi was out, and Ren gestures to the clock on the wall.

Time has returned, so he is able to provide a real answer.)

3 whole days.

...

[Oh. Well. He wasn't expecting to hear that Ren followed Loki, presumably to keep him from destroying his reputation. His gaze drifts to the water glass, dimly realizing he's squeezing it far too tightly, and forcing himself to relax his grip and take another sip of water as if everything is fine.]

I see.

[So they fell asleep. Time has been restored, for better or worse. Death continues not to be permanent, which is irritating considering he'd like nothing more than to thrust Hornet into the same hell he'd clawed his way out of.

Focus. Don't think about the past. Focus on the present, for now. Keep it together.]

If you're here, I assume the others are safe.

(Wordlessly, Ren offers his hand to take the glass - a single taste of water in three days would not be enough and Ren's more than willing to get more.

Everything is not fine.

Not for Akechi, with how each and every motion is tense, confused, angry and concerned. Ren doesn't know what happened beyond the shot, but surely it would be traumatizing to hear the fact alone that he's been in a coma after a sudden death.

Not for Ren, either. Ren, who held Akechi's lifeless and stiff body after witnessing the bullet shatter his very skull in full sight. Ren, who feels betrayed he wasn't a part of Akechi's fight when he was the target all along. Ren, who hasn't dealt with it properly as far, his main concern being just present for when, not if, Akechi woke up.

But right now, all they can do is deal with it. Should Akechi hand the glass, Ren takes it and returns to the bed with a fresh refil of water.)

They are. We woke up together.

[He hands the almost-empty glass back just as wordlessly. Logically, he knows he should eat something, but his stomach is clenched too tightly to even consider it. It's not until he takes the glass back that he nods, listening to Ren's answer with something like relief. He'd suspected the others weren't killed, considering he hadn't encountered them in that nightmare of a hellscape.

They all woke up together, and he didn't. Three days...

It's difficult to say, but he manages to meet Ren's eyes and give him a nod he hopes is reassuring.] ...Thank you. If you need to tend to other matters, I'm... fine, now.

You're welcome... But I don't. (He did take a break from the cafe, after all. Blue can handle it on his own for a few more hours, he's sure, since Ren hasn't stepped foot in there so far.

His instinct is to tell Akechi he's not going anywhere, not when all that has happened happened and with how Akechi's still recovering from it. His brain screams that he has to be here, but... He's learned. He won't force it.)

I don't want to leave but I'll go if you'd like to be alone.

Edited (html brrrr) 2020-11-05 22:25 (UTC)

...

[It's hard to say whether or not he wants to be alone. There'd be a certain satisfaction to throwing Ren out of his own room, a minor way of seizing control over a situation where he has none. But Ren doesn't want to leave. Impossibly, even after staying with him for three days already, he still wants to stay.

He exhales through his nose and shakes his head, setting the half-full glass of water aside for now and forcing himself to his feet. Everything hurts from being still for so long, and he takes a breath before moving to a clearer section of the room to start stretching and limbering up.]

I'm not throwing you out of your room after you stayed here with me.

[Which. He didn't ask for, and it isn't his fault that Ren wasted his time like that, but still. It's... nice.

Back to the more important matters:]

How did you get us out?

(There's a small smile that lifts the corner of his mouth. Nevermind that he doesn't see it the way Akechi put it - he's not being thrown, but instead, giving the other space in their room so that he can deal with the situation however way he sees fit. The way he sees is, Akechi is accepting the support, and Ren's taking it.

On the kitchen counter, the little portable stove still supports the pot Ren had cooked from earlier. The curry sitting in it is not his best - he did make it with leftovers, after all, but it should be good enough to sustain them before Ren can find them better ingredients. All Ren does is to light the fire, grabbing chopsticks to stirr.)

I didn't. At some point, it just happened. (As much as Ren would have loved to be a part of it - forcing the God to pull the plug on the nightmare.

But no. All he remembers is being there and then waking up under a pile of his most beloved.)

And no one else has taken credit?

[Troubling. To think that at any moment, they could be whisked back into that world...

Ah. That does remind him, and he frowns even as he keeps stretching.]

So we have no way of knowing when we'll be knocked out again. Should we ever begin to feel exhaustion and sleep again...

[Since he doesn't know that's already a thing, after all, chalking up his own exhaustion to having been dead until recently.]

No, not at all.

(Even with witnessing everyone's powers, he hardly thinks anyone had anything to do with it. The Void always has irregularities, perhaps it just forgot to wake them up for whatever long they had been passed out.)

We already have. (And finally, he serves a bowl of curry, handing it to the other.)

There are storms and electricity now, too.

Edited 2020-11-05 23:04 (UTC)

[He finishes stretching by flexing his fingers, looking for where he'd left his gloves. At least he's grateful he hadn't fallen asleep with them on; that'd make for some pretty gross hands after three (or more) days. Satisfied they're still on the desk where he'd left them, he leaves them there for now, looking back to Ren.

Whatever he might have said is lost as the other boy simply hands him a bowl of curry, and he takes it more from reflex than any conscious thought. It's not that he's unused to the other serving him food, but rather, it's waking up and immediately being, for lack of a better word, taken care of. It leaves him oddly speechless for a moment, chest aching in the familiar way that only Ren makes him feel.]

I... [he starts, stops, then simply closes his eyes and sighs, more at himself than at Ren.] Thank you. I assume the storms and electricity are related?

Edited 2020-11-06 21:26 (UTC)

(He comes close enough simply to press a gentle, tiny but quick kiss to Akechi's cheek before he retreats back to his bed to sit on. It's simple reassurance - Ren's still with him, regardless of what happened down in the nightmare and what might come of what they discuss later.

His eyes close with the smile that effortlessly graces his lips as a reply, and he nods. Upset or not, Ren couldn't be happier to be here, with Akechi, after he almost lost him again. It's a relief and a bliss, and Ren can be mad at him later.)

If it's storming close enough, electronics work. (And he gestures to the laptop, one he didn't even remember they had before this.) We have Minesweeper now.

Ren...

[His eyes close once again at the simple kiss to his cheek, but before he can reach out, Ren's already retreating. He takes a breath and crosses the room to sit, sitting at the desk so he can more easily eat and face the other boy than if they were both on the bed.]

Minesweeper, [he says, a hint of dryness entering his voice, as if to say really?] Now that the concept of time exists, I hope you're not wasting it.

(Of course he is wasting it, at least a little, in the way Akechi sees it. He spent quite a while documenting the times marked on the clock with the storms and electricity peaks, but even so, he has been here for the past three days... There had to be some degree of distraction so that he stopped looping the events in his head.)

I'll remember that. (When he sees you secretly playing on the computer out of boredom, Akechi.)

Edited 2020-11-06 22:06 (UTC)

Good.

[Excuse you, he only spends his time in meaningful ways!!

He exhales a sigh and tries to eat some of the curry. He knows logically he should be hungry, so he forces himself to eat it, but it's a struggle.

Finally he has to ask,] How did you kill my cognitive self?

It disappeared when it killed you.

(Ren sighs, trying to keep the image out of his mind. The words, the shot, the feeling of nothingness until it sank.

It takes him a while to speak again, but he keeps his eyes on the other.)

It was not my nightmare. I'm not worried or scared about you hurting me. (A beat later;) How scared are you of us?

...I see.

[As far as Akechi's concerned, this conversation is now over. After all, if the apparition were killed, then it's not worth thinking about any longer. Ren had obviously survived the encounter, and that's all that matters.

But of course Ren can't leave it at that. Akechi's stomach seizes up with tension, and he sets the half-empty bowl of curry aside to instead glare at the other boy.]

Don't be absurd, [he snaps before he can stop himself.] You don't scare me.

I never said "me". (Whatever the relationship they have is called.)

I mean us. (Ren repeats, deadpan. Akechi heard it the first time, he's sure, and Ren is not found of repeating himself. Yet, he's still patient, even if he feels as anxious as he could get.

The first thing he can reach for is his glasses, resting on the edge of the bed and he takes it to fidget with. Skinny fingers twist the parts of the accessory before he continues:)

"Hurting you is the only thing I'm capable of, after all" - That's the last thing it said before it shot you in the head.

[Akechi just stares at him, feeling more like a caged animal than he had when he'd first woken up. He watches Ren fiddle with his glasses, feels a muscle in his jaw twitch and realizes only then that he's gritting his teeth.

So he forces himself to at least look relaxed, even if it feels like every muscle is stretched taut like a spring about to snap.]

Does it matter? The cognitive being was dealt with. Now, if we're dragged back into that... alternate world, perhaps it'll become relevant, but for now? [He flicks a hand dismissively.] It's not important.

Of course it matters.

(And Akechi has left Ren dumbfounded and edging enraged, just with a few words. With just a few sounds, all the anger that he has managed to cool bubbles up once again, Ren being the one gritting his teeth when Akechi relaxes.)

How is it not important, Goro? Do you expect me to just nevermind it?!

(How could he? Just go back to their routine, like he wasn't holding the knowledge that Akechi still seems to have reservations, overwhelming fears, even after all the talking they've had over the past months? To know that he's scared, and not be able to relief his anxieties when Ren himself is directly the target of those?

Those are not options.)

What- [he starts, voice edging into a snarl, before he forces himself to stop and take a breath. There's anger in his eyes, but if he looks, Ren might be able to see the same kind of fear he feels hidden behind that reflexive surge of anger.] What do you want me to say?

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