open: funemployment

[forceofnature]

Who: Viridi and lowly peons
What: November activities
Where: See inside!
When: November. Probably.
Content Warnings: None to start

[prelude: messiah station square (feel free to reply to this, too)]

[A small girl stands in front of the job listings and rifles through them with a disgruntled expression.]

'Merlaut Apartments: Security officer requested. Keep all intruders safely indoors'?
'Chicago L Station: Seeking train director. Direct a train in a play'?
'Wall Market Bathhouse: Attendant needed. Wash ten faces in the bathhouse water'?

These are ridiculous! And demeaning! Who would even want to do any of these pointless tasks; some kind of spineless moron, I'll tell you wh --

Comments

[abeautifulgame]

[he hums]

And the other guy definitely would have gotten lots of other eyes. [a beat, then by way of explanation:] Irish Mob. [they ruined a lot of things beyond just his legs and have been for years, decades]

[forceofnature]

Eh...

[a slight pause]

I'm not supposed to know what that is yet, so let's just do the whole nudge nudge wink wink kind of thing.

[She pitches her voice a little higher.]

Gosh, what is that? Are you talking about that island filled with those uncivilized Celts way to the northwest? And a mob at that. Terrible. Would hate it if they moved across an ocean and started terrorizing a newer continent.

[A clearing of the throat.]

Anyway, you all are great at inventing new and exciting ways to be terrible to each other. How'd you run afoul of that?

[abeautifulgame]

[ ... ]

Who, exactly, do you think you need to perform for?

[he might come back to how he got the Chicago South Club's attention in a minute, but right now, he's more interested in that. maybe her theory as to why they're all here involves having to entertain someone? like The Truman Show, maybe?]

[forceofnature]

I mean, you.

I'm pretty blase about it, but I have approximate knowledge of most things in the future by dint of my occupation, and it usually bugs people out who'd rather not deal with oracular divination.

[...]

Goddess, by the way. My occupation is goddess.

[abeautifulgame]

[he shrugs]

My other half is a goddess. [his girlfriend, though he hates that term as a qualifier. they're not in fucking high school] Melinoë? [maybe they've met. either way, the point is that he's not bugged, as it were]

[forceofnature]

[A theatrical gasp.]

Mel has a boyfriend?! Oooooooooh ~

[Viridi is definitely in fucking high school.]

...Wait, you're a human. ...Mel has a human boyfriend? Oh, that's weird. Well, I guess she's reincarnated in human form. So that's fine. Right?

I don't know how that works.

Just don't go making any weird super babies; it never turns out well.

[abeautifulgame]

[he shrugs]

It works.

[he can't say it's worked perfectly between them, all things considered, but -- every relationship has its ups and downs, right? not that he's going to get into that. it's none of her business]

But no. I'm a little too old for kids -- [he already has a kid, back home. Marcus, fifteen. he also hasn't seen him in ten fucking years because his ex-wife is a bitch] -- and well. Who knows if this place even understands pregnancy to begin with? [it doesn't understand death, for the most part; why why it understand life?]

[forceofnature]

Eh, you'd be surprised at how long males can be fertile. ...Evolution, am I right or am I right?

[ok gross why are we talking about this]

But I doubt this place will figure it out anytime soon. In the meantime, you treat her well or you'll have two goddesses out to smite you.

Us gals gotta stick together.

[abeautifulgame]

[lucky for him, if things ever do go south, no one has any powers here, so that threat holds no weight. lucky for him, even if they did, he knows a whole group of people who know how to kill a god]

[either way, after a beat, he shrugs]

I wasn't planning on hurting her.

[little does he know and never mind the fact that she ends up hurting him, cheating on him and all]

[forceofnature]

[don't underestimate small children
she fights dirty and her fists are within easy reach of sensitive parts]

Mm-hmmmmm.

[...And at that, she seems to abruptly lose interest.]

Well, you kids go have fun. I have a lobby to keep occupied. Let me know if you want that anatomical deep dive sometime.

Favor for Mel.

[abeautifulgame]

[that was, in fact, abrupt -- so much so, in fact, that he blinks in the face of what's an obvious dismissal. it's a moment and a shake of his head before he recovers]

I'll keep that in mind.

[and then, yeah, sure, whatever. he's absolutely like to escape this pandemonium, so he'll just go be somewhere else, dodging wildlife on his way out. one of these days, he'll remember to actually give his name to people, the first time they meet]

[forceofnature]

Oh good.

[As Damien leaves, Viridi turns back to her workstation to find a smattering of what look like seed packets all over it.]

Finally.

Eh, I guess you can all stay if you want; I don't care. Try to keep property damage to a minimum.